In the process of a child’s growth, the rebellious period will be in three periods, respectively, in different age groups, they are 2 ~ 3 years old infant rebellious period, 6 ~ 8 years old rebellious period of child rebellion, and 12 ~ 18 years old youth rebellious period. Each stage progresses step by step as the child matures and becomes more difficult to discipline.Today we will briefly look at the causes of rebellion in children and how to solve it.
I. Why do they rebel?
Many parents think that if they can satisfy their children’s material needs, they are taking the best care of their children. When a child’s inner needs are not met, he or she will be insecure and discontented, and will attract parental attention in some special or even extreme ways.
2, children enter the rebellious period, especially in the youth rebellious period, physical and psychological rapid changes, children’s consciousness continues to mature, there will be a lot of different views and ideas in the heart of the parents and teachers, although these ideas have not experienced the polishing of time, slightly childish, but this does not prevent the child’s to express.
Therefore, when the child’s new ideas meet the parents’ old ideas, it is easy for them to collide and become what parents see as rebellious behaviour.
What should we do if we are rebellious?
1、Understand rebellion and accept it.
Rebellion is a process that every child goes through. Parents need to understand that your child is bound to have such an experience at some stage. Furthermore, it is important to accept rebellion, to see the helplessness, anxiety, nervousness and anxiety behind your child’s rebellion, and to soothe your child and give him more moral support. But acceptance is not about endless tolerance. When your child does something wrong, you should calmly point it out and guide your child to correct it.
3. Build trust and learn to recognise.
Trust between parents and children is invaluable. Only when there is mutual trust can there be no disconnection, and only then can you enter your child’s heart successfully. For example, if you do what you say you will do, don’t confuse your child; if you trust your child and believe in him, you will gain his trust when you give him trust.
And approval and trust are cause and effect. Your approval comes from trusting your child, and your trust will prompt you to approve of what your child is doing. When your child knows that he or she is being approved, he or she will be more confident, powerful and secure, and will face the rebellious emotions within with a more sunny and positive side.
4. Learn to communicate and listen well.
Rebellious children are often reluctant to communicate with their parents for no other reason than that there is a generation gap, no topic of conversation, parents do not respect them enough, and words are not exchanged. If you want to communicate well with your child, you may want to learn about his interests, not just know the skinny, but go deeper. Or change the way you communicate, you become the confidant, tell your child about the gossip around you, what is bothering you at work and treat your child as a friend.
After your child is willing to communicate with you, become a listener, understand what your child is thinking and seeing, give your child timely feedback, do not laugh at your child’s naive ideas and discuss them seriously with him.
Finally, we would also like to say that in practical family education, spiritual needs are as important as material needs, and each child’s family conditions are different.
